How I first met Connie

I met Connie in 1998. I had just started my transition and had been kicked out of my house. My sister, Jenn, was living with her at the time. Jenn told me there was an extra room at the house and I was welcome to it. Before I moved in, I met Connie. She was a very soft spoken, sensitive person. She had a very level head. She welcomed me into her house. As I got to know her better, over the five years we lived together, I saw her invite many people into our house. Often they had no other place to go. They were at their wits end and were not sure how they were going to survive. Connie would take them in, console them, and get them back on their feet. Many people feel they owe their life to Connie.

Lolabell Connies truck.

Connie rebuilt this truck from the ground up. She named it Lolablell. She was very proud of her. She used it for her equipment repair business. Connie always love to work with heavy equipment but that male dominated, macho world was difficult to work in right after her transition. But as time went on and Connie became more confident in herself, she move back into that world. She was able to establish a business and did very well for herself.

Silencing Chevy’s restaurant

Early in our transition we all use to go out to dinner at a local Chevy’s. You have to keep in mind that this was ten years ago and most people had never heard the word transgender before. The first time we went into Chevy’s, the waitress was a very flustered. She didn’t know what to do. Finally, she sat us at a table at the back of the restaurant. I think in her mind she wanted to keep us in a less conspicuous place. But in order to get us there we had to walk through the entire restaurant. As we walked through Chevy’s a hush came over the place. I’ve never been in a quiet Chevy’s before so it was pretty spooky. Finally, people started talking again.

Over time we frequented many restaurants in the area. We became friends with the waitresses and they seemed to relax. The earth wasn’t going to stop spinning. Customers weren’t going to run out of the place. They started giving us special treatment. Also as the hormones took effect it became easier to pass. People just didn’t seem to notice us. It was nice to be able to eat dinner without a lot of drama.

Connie and I had many talks about being true to ourselves. It took a while to feel safe to let down the walls. It took a while to get comfortable and find out who we really were. All we needed was a little time, confidence and acceptance and we were very happy.